Numb

I still feel, though it's a phantom,
A knowledge of what should be.
Something brings a tear to the eye,
In an unknown place, a smile flourishes.

Simple pleasures are all I have,
They cut through the haze.
Complex thoughts seem clogged and coated,
In if's, but's - a battalion of unknowns.

Moments of real feeling surface,
As dye in water, amorphous and flaring.
Though at one dissipate,
Leaving only a memory - pastel pink for red.

Where does the importance lie?
I can't see from the fog.
Will it be as before, comfortably waiting,
Or different, shifting beneath this cloak.

The birds remind that life goes on,
Flitting from house to house.
Not everything stays still; lethargy is not contagious,
Do they dance on the clouds as I sink in the blue?

I lived in naive comfort - complacent,
That I would orchestrate as master.
This is shattered, edges still sharp,
Digging in as she makes the moves.

They say that time is the greatest healer,
I just can't point to the pain.
It's balm just adds to the murk,
Giving tether to groundless thoughts.

From nowhere a veil's been dropped,
The sun's not quite as bright.
Things change, I accept this,
I just hope colours return as vivid as before.